Christmas 2009

So, Christmas Eve.

I just need to say out loud, right now, that being able to wear short sleeves and drive with my sunroof open on December 24th without freezing to death will never, EVER, get old. That's all.

We all gathered at the George Ranch for a fun-filled evening of binge-eating and booze and a continuous flow of laughter that never seemed to end. It was just, a great time. I don't know how else to describe it other than in those simple words. Seeing smiles that seemed to be permanently glued to everyone's' faces was completely contagious and just sitting in a room full of people that I care about. There were (or seemed to be) mountains of presents and watching the young(er) kids tear through them is always fun... even when they do seem to take FOREVER.  Regardless, my cheeks still hurt from smiling and laughing when I woke up the next day so I'd have to say it was a success. Next year though, it going to be awesome. Not one, but TWO babies will be in the mix and the cuteness that will come out of that night will probably be enough to make my heart explode. Well, I've at least got a year to prepare for that.

It was easier this year, much easier than last. I'm still getting used to the fact that I'm around people who have the luxury of having their parents around them while I don't, but my family here more than compensates for it. I have to think of it like, at least I have them, these loving and caring people that put up with me regardless of what I do. That helps fill the aching void in my heart as I look over and see others lean against their Mom's for comfort or high-five their Dad's just because they can. It's really tough sometimes. Sometimes it seems unbearable but I think in some weird and twisted way, it makes me appreciate them even more than I already do. Maybe that doesn't sound right or make sense, but I guess that's how I look at it. Or have to look at it. I don't ever expect not being able to see them whenever I want to not bother me, that would be terrible. But I expect that as I get older, it will get easier. Leaving though, I believe will always be just as tough as the last time. That's just the way it all seems to work.

So I guess what I'm saying is that presents are nice. Gifts are great and I'm thankful for everything that I received but I think I'm finally at the point where I can appreciate the togetherness, unity and camaraderie I get just being in the same room as my family. For those few hours, I'm just able to feel pure and unadulterated happiness which could only be made better by my own parents being there. But since that's not (or wasn't a) option this year, it was the best Christmas gift I think I could have ever gotten.